Chapter 9's title is Intimacy and Distance in Relational Communication. The book lists four different dimensions of intimacy in interpersonal relationships: physical, intellectual, emotional, and shared activities. Even though you might have a relationship with someone, that does not necessarily mean that it is an intimate relationship. One could argue that if every relationship you had was intimate, none of your relationships would be intimate, leading to the supposed opinion that a select few in your realm of relationships can attain this level of relationship, and that you must choose who specifically to place into your "intimate" bubble.
Self-Disclosure is one of largest components of an interpersonal relationship, and something that can judge between whether your relationship is intimate at all, or to what degree is is intimate. The book definition of self-disclosure is: honest, revealing messages about the self that are intentionally directed toward others. It involves 'opening up' to the other person in a way where you might feel vulnerable at times. The closeness of the relationship is determined by how much you can trust this person with information about yourself that not everyone may know.
Chapter 10's title is Improving Communication Climates. This was one of the most interesting chapters in the book thus far in my opinion. It deals with how we respond to criticism and confrontation that is about us, or someone else. One of the things I've found about myself and my personality is that I tend to get defensive when confronted. Obviously it is because I feel like the other person is looking at the situation in the wrong way, or I feel like I have a good excuse or a good reason for doing what I did or acting the way I did. However, I've learned that if there is a situation when someone confronts me, the best way to go about handling it is by responding in a non-defensive way. I need to intentionally tell myself to not defend what I did, but instead listen closely to what the other person is saying and why they are saying it.
If this important step is done, it is easy to resolve conflict or a miscommunication because it gives me the 'high-road' approach and even if I don't personally agree with what the person is saying about me, I can begin to fix the situation or at least compromise to make it better.
Self-Disclosure is one of largest components of an interpersonal relationship, and something that can judge between whether your relationship is intimate at all, or to what degree is is intimate. The book definition of self-disclosure is: honest, revealing messages about the self that are intentionally directed toward others. It involves 'opening up' to the other person in a way where you might feel vulnerable at times. The closeness of the relationship is determined by how much you can trust this person with information about yourself that not everyone may know.
Chapter 10's title is Improving Communication Climates. This was one of the most interesting chapters in the book thus far in my opinion. It deals with how we respond to criticism and confrontation that is about us, or someone else. One of the things I've found about myself and my personality is that I tend to get defensive when confronted. Obviously it is because I feel like the other person is looking at the situation in the wrong way, or I feel like I have a good excuse or a good reason for doing what I did or acting the way I did. However, I've learned that if there is a situation when someone confronts me, the best way to go about handling it is by responding in a non-defensive way. I need to intentionally tell myself to not defend what I did, but instead listen closely to what the other person is saying and why they are saying it.
If this important step is done, it is easy to resolve conflict or a miscommunication because it gives me the 'high-road' approach and even if I don't personally agree with what the person is saying about me, I can begin to fix the situation or at least compromise to make it better.
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